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Further damage continues and stops on the inside

 Damage: harm that impairs the value, usefulness, or normal function of something.







FREE AND HAPPY

For the most part when we were younger we were free and happy. Inconveniences were not so much of a big deal compared to the current age. We would be wronged and be sad or cry about it, then forgive and move on. We would not remain in the same pain or disappointment for so long. We were open to everything and would willingly move on to the next thing.

WHAT HAPPENED?

A lot has changed. We all have different stories to tell but the common factor is growth. For the purpose of this article i will define growth as being exposed to, being presented with an opportunity to learn or experience a new thing. An experience is meant to give shape to our frame of mind; to completely reform: that is to change your mind with regards to a person or a situation; OR to retain the current frame regarding a person or a situation. Remaining are experiences; convenient and inconvenient, joy and pain. We feel wronged by people and life once in a while, still. Leaving us sad and disappointed, and sometime crying. However, it takes us longer now to forgive and move on without holding on to the disappointment, to the pain. We experience pain or loss in varying degrees. The unthinkable happen to us costing us things such as trust, happiness, peace and comfort, and safety; and we find ourselves befriending the pain, befriending the disappointment, befriending fear and the very thing that keeps on robbing us and taking from us.

THE RIGHT CONTROL

It is evident from our lives, individually that we are here to experience, to do, to decide and to exercise control. With every experience our perspective takes form. External factors will always affect our lives one way or another, one of the most important being the social; and we can only decide "what now?" concerning ourselves and exercise a measure of control. Further damage continues but stops on the inside WHEN we decide and exercise the right control. Control: exercising authority over; or being in charge of an outcome.

To be happy and free at this life is to be mindful of what is happening or happened and what emotions it leaves and exercising right control. For instance, as citizens of the country we do not have control over the power cuts taking place in our communities around SA. It negatively affects our plans and we find ourselves adapting a lot and having to improvise. Because of the right plan on our part we find ourselves less angry or frustrated with Eskom than before. We function better because we have measures put in place to work around the problem, to still engage in our human activities.

STARTING A NEW THING?

Life happened. Life is happening. Life will happen.

As it does i have made two major decisions; one of them to free myself and the other is to really take control of my happiness. I have found that freedom is what i do for my self and it all starts on the frame of mind. Pain and disappointments comes with being human, so does joy and freedom. The only difference is to live a life full of joy and freedom requires intent. If we are to keep the peace that guarantees freedom we need to start and keep on, so long as we live, working on our selves, being mindful of the state of our mind and emotions and putting on work to keep the positive-bright, benefiting, thoughts and let go of negative- dark, draining, thoughts. What we focus on expands.

WHAT TO DO

As mentioned before you have to be intentional with positivity, treat it like a treasure you cannot loose. People are different and different things work for different individuals. To help me stay happy and at peace i watch the 1. language i use towards myself. In the past when i struggle i would say unkind words to myself, but now i have learnt to be patient with myself in times of difficulty. 2. I am an introvert so i love my me time so i can meditate; be mindful of my thoughts and emotions, and make better adjustment. You cannot fix what you do not know. I do keep good friends for good company to help me cope and keep the positive energy. Meaningful relationships are important. 3. One of the ways to keep our joy, and peace battery with power is to schedule joy: setting aside and honouring time for activities that brings us to a beautiful place. Eg. making time for prayer, playing games, exercising etc. There are different ways to look after our mental health and no one is going to do the work for us but you and i. We are responsible for our mental, emotional and social well-being.

QUOTES

"Change is hard at first, messy in the middle and gorgeous in the end." ~Robin Sharma

"Worry drains the mind of its power and sooner or later, it injures the soul." ~Robin Sharma

"I have not failed, I've just found 10 000 ways that won't work." ~Thomas Edison


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